Well, guys know about one place for sure. Here's how to surprise them with the other six!
- Justin DeMarco, BettyConfidential.com
I used to think talking with girls at West Village bars was difficult -until I had to start conversations with guys about the seven places they like to be touched most.
The men I talked to were baffled by the number seven.
"Seven? Why seven?" says Daniel, a 27-year-old artist living in New York City. "I can't even think of three."
"I can think of only one place," said Matt, a 26-year-old working in a Manhattan advertising agency. He turned red and giggled like a little boy.
"It's the junk, of course," said Chris, a 23-year-old medical student from New York. "Why are there seven?"
It's a lucky number for some people? I really don't know why the number seven is important, but I did find someone who had no trouble coming up with seven magic spots to touch men. She's Dr. Joy Davidson, a New York City sex therapist and creator of "The Joy Spot" sexuality education video series.
"Men like to be caressed and kissed, nibbled all over, just like women," Dr. Joy says. "They're just less likely to ask someone to do it. However, different men have different hot spots. It's best to experiment and discover what he enjoys. The more places you stroke, the more pleasure he'll feel overall anyway."
While "Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes," is a creative children's song, it just won't cut it for this particular topic. So, instead of making you feel your way around and find out the hard way, Dr. Joy is here to help you discover the best ways to work the male erogenous zones.
1. The Ultimate Joy Spot
"In terms of 'on the money' touch, go for the perineum," Dr. Joy says. "It's the flesh under the scrotum leading toward the anus. Stroke and gently press along the length of it."
Guys will let you know, not always in words but lots of times in "oohs and aahs" or an ear-to-ear smile, when you're turning them on. One place you can never go wrong with a guy is that area below the belt and above the "V" in his pants. Please don't make me spell it out anymore.
2. The Inner Thigh
Chances are you're not going to grab a guy's goods the first time you meet (unless things go really well) or even the first few times you hang out. That doesn't mean you can't come close and give him a hint that you know what you're doing, especially if you've only been together in public places at this point in your relationship and want more intimacy.
"Stroke the inner thigh if you can do it without being too obvious," Dr. Joy recommends. "Get close to, but don't quite touch, his package. Be a tease."
Dr. Joy, on behalf of all of the men in the world, while I respect your professional advice, ladies, please do not be a tease in that area. It just hurts in more ways than one.
3. The Neck
"A kiss on the neck is a good thing," says Alan, a 23-year-old photographer living in Los Angeles. "You kind of get that tingle, you know, that feeling that goes up the spine when the hairs on the back of your neck stand up."
That'd probably be a lot sexier if it wasn't the same feeling Haley Joel Osment had in The Sixth Sense when he saw dead people.
4. The Back
"Hands and nails along a man's back will often feel wonderful," Dr. Joy says. "Just keep in mind that men may like a slightly firmer touch than women do. The kind of light, feathery stroke with fingertips that women often crave can be annoying or just feel tickly to a man. Don't be afraid to alternate being gentle and firm."
5. The Ear
Jeff, a 33-year-old producer from Los Angeles, says there's nothing like a girl playing with his ear when they're fooling around. "All of a sudden I'll start making my 'O-face, '" Jeff says, referencing one of his favorite movies, Office Space. "It just feels so good."
"All people feel 'skin hunger' for touch," Dr. Joy says. "This is why men often ask for a massage. It's more macho to ask you to knead his aching muscles than to tell you that he just needs to be caressed all over. Truth is, he may not even know himself that his 'skin hunger' makes him long for full body contact."
Dr. Joy also recommends using your hair as an alternative way to draw a reaction from him. "Long hair draped on and gliding over his body, his chest and stomach, especially as she follows with her lips, definitely works."
7. The Face
"Besides my ----- ," says Alex, a 29-year-old New York producer, "I actually like getting my face touched. It's very soothing and makes me feel safe and wanted."
And don't forget the lips! "When kissing," Dr. Joy says, "run a fingertip along the lip or the inside of the mouth. This can be very erotic and surprising and sexy."
If you can follow Dr. Joy's tips, I can guarantee you you'll be making some guys very, very happy. I almost made my "O-face" several times just by visualizing her advice.
Tell us: what place on your guy's body drives him wild?
Justin DeMarco is a New York City-based writer. He co-wrote Hockey: The Musical with Rick Wilson, which premiered at the Toronto Fringe Festival in 2008.